It’s been
awhile since my last entry. I guess you could say my need for routine has
loosened a bit... I still jot notes down every night but I no longer need to
publish a complete blog post before going to sleep. That said, I am pleased
that there are some changes happening in my life that will allow me more time
to write again. I still feel that this blog is important, not just to me, but
to someone who will someday read it and use it as a resource, either to
understand the mind of their child or to understand themselves.
I stopped my
daily writing in September, when my mom came for a visit. I was so excited for
her arrival. A lot of girls say it, but my mom is truly my best friend. We have
a closer relationship than most mothers and daughters do. We had the same
extracurricular activity for 20 years. We spent night after night at the studio
together. We had rituals like Tuesday night dinners at Friendly’s before dance
and cookies at the bakery on Saturdays between classes. At home, my mom would
call me into the family room and FORCE me to practice my dances... but I always
knew them and that always made me feel good about myself.
But it wasn’t
just dance. My mom is simply awesome! She knows from my voice when something is
wrong, she always knows how to make everything okay, and she’s the only one who
can calm me down when I am panicking. She knows just how to make me laugh and
when to be serious. Sure, we fight. Every mother and daughter do... But I
wouldn’t know what to do without her.
The day of
mom’s arrival I was on cloud 9. I got to work and was dancing around the store
telling everyone who would listen that my mom was coming. All day, I kept
peeking towards the front of the store, waiting for that familiar face to come
through that door. Of course, nothing is like it is in the movies. My mom came
in while I was with a customer and rather than running to greet her as I had
intended, I instead had to settle for a tiny wave and 15 excruciating minutes of
a customer asking inane questions about every item on the shelf in front of
them.
FINALLY the
customer decided to leave, of course empty handed, and I was free to go give my
mom a hug. This showing of affection
surprised my co-workers who know me as the “please don’t touch me” girl. (We
have a customer who comes in regularly and gives me a hug every time he sees
me. After explaining about my Aspergers 6 or 7 times, I finally decided to just
grin and bear it and awkwardly stand there until he lets go.) I’ve always been
able to show affection towards my family members and have never had an issue
with physical contact when it came to family (except with my Nana, who said I
didn’t kiss her like I meant it... I was just putting my lips to her face...
but I don’t know if that was an Aspie thing or not), but I can see where my
co-workers shock stemmed from.
What
happened next truly surprised me. My coworkers figured out a way that I could
leave for the day and spend more time with my mom. They took care of
everything. They got coverage, managerial permission, and sent us on our way. I
had been excited for my mom to meet my team; the people who I was working WITH
not beside... but they gave me a more momentous thing to celebrate: true
friendship. It’s not co-workers who will go out of their way to make sure you
get to spend time with your mom; it’s friends.
No comments:
Post a Comment